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Another complaint I have is that the Uruguayans don’t go out until 1 in the morning at the earliest.I’m used to this phenomenon from having lived in Eastern Europe but there the party is awesome and there’s hot, smart, fun chicks everywhere.

Expect overpriced beers, shitty Latin music, and more fat chicks than even Raul could shake a stick at. If you liked this article check out our latest on Uruguay here.

Image buying her a 2 dollar drink at the beachside bar in Montevideo before whisking her off to a tango club and then having coffee the next afternoon on the beach. Obviously they are better than the American chicks, but in the bars I went to it was a not uncommon occurrence to see a group of 5 chicks of the right age group come in the bar and 4 of them be completely unbangable, no matter how many overpriced drinks you drank. That never, ever, ever in a million years would happen in Bulgaria and it happened several times a night in the “hot clubs” of Montevideo.

Their personalities are also like the food, flavorless and dull.

However Argentinos, especially from Buenos Aires are snobby. Uruguay is in between the two places, less well-known, and probably cheaper, less snobby, and the same gene pool. It will be the beginning of summer (December) and it will be a cheap place with lots of hot chicks and good weather. There’s never anything spicy, never anything healthy.

I don’t need a visa to go there (like Brazil) and my frequent flier miles will work for that ticket. I’ll hang out for a while drinking for cheap at beachside bars and picking up girls that are 90% as hot as Adriana Lima. Imagine walking down the street with a chick with 90% of that hotness. If you go to a fancy place, they’ll bring you a giant steak, with some tomatoes and iceberg lettuce ( I never saw anything but iceberg lettuce in Uruguay). The Uruguayans will dig in with gusto to a plate of fries covered in yellow cheese sauce, unseasoned. The most jarring realization I had was that the chicks in Uruguay are shockingly so-so.

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